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Watching too much shit tends to make you trivialize how horrible people actually are! That's why we laugh and joke at the devil, but in fact we're scared to death!
I didn't think it would make it through the day or night but it did I just hope it holds on til I get up to take care of it its mom is sick too and her sister that also has kittens yep I have my hands full but I love them cross your fingers for me
haven't been to bed yet I have a sick kitten and been gaming but I will be going soon and good morning
MY LIVING NIGHTMARE II
Several of our Kaotic brothers asked for more info about my life with THE WICKED RED WITCH FROM HELL. Ok, remember when you wake up screaming after reading this story, you wanted it.
A few weeks after I made the worst mistake of my life, marrying the Witch from Hell, my in laws invited us over for thanks giving dinner. There were 20 people, family and friends, gathered and I
had hopes she wouldn't "go off" in front of these people, as she had done at church several times.
Out of the blue, she decided to impress everyone at the dinner. "Get me a glass of water, now." You are closer to the sink, get one yourself." "I said now MOTHERFUCKER!" Everyone at the huge table stopped to see if I was going to stick the carving knife in her throat. I got up and calmly walked around ten people seated and got her the water. When I placed the glass on the table in front of her, I whispered in her ear "Good luck getting home....." I walked out to the car and drove the 20 miles home." Someone dropped her off at our house hours later. "You embarrassed me in front of my family, asshole..."
After my oldest son was born, she picked up a new trick. When cussing me out for reasons real or imagined didn't work. she would scoop up my infant son, run up to me and slap the shit out of me, then hold the baby up like a shield so I wouldn't hit her and risk injuring my son. One of my background investigators, after meeting her, asked me if I ever hit her. "No sir, because if I hit her once I couldn't stop until she was dead." "I would go to prison and her fucked up family would raise my kids." "Oh"
After she stole my car, so I couldn't go to work or go to appointments to get hired as a cop, she snatched up my sons and took off. I filed for divorce and we both had to hire lawyers, because she wanted everything we had, except the silver fillings in my teeth. The judge sent all parties involved out to the court lobby to see if we could come to an agreement. Red threw one of her famous screaming fits. Her lawyer couldn't shut her up and the bailiffs started heading over to resolve the breach of peace. Her lawyer told her to shut up or she was going to jail and plead with me and my lawyer to make a deal on her terms. I looked at my lawyer "Sir, let's just take this to hearing." "When the respondent goes off in open court, like she has been, I will get everything I want...."
Her lawyer knew I was right and got the witch to settle in a reasonable manor.
When my second son was born, we were having natural child birth, like with the first one. She, once again, threw a fit in the maternity unit and started screaming profanities at me and the nursing staff.
I made the tactical error of standing too close to the side of the bed she was laying on. Without warning, she grabbed my balls in a death grip and began directing all of the profanity at me. The nurse in the room demanded she let go of my balls or she would shoot the witch up and knock her ass out for the delivery. I was doubled over in pain and her OB/GYN offered to check me for any serious injury.
My life is much more simple since I fired her years ago. I have developed a belief in divine retribution
or Karma. Since she moved to Texas, she has been in a few near fatal car crashes, had her double wide blown off it's foundation from a fertilizer plant explosion and became disabled when two Rottweilers attacked her and injured both of her hands and arms permanently.
One night, I woke up screaming at the top of my lungs. My wife had already learned not to grab me to try and wake me up. (Previously, I woke up choking the shit out of her during a nightmare.) When I snapped out of my delirium, I told her that I dreamed I woke up and the Wicked Red Witch From Hell was sitting in the corner of our bedroom. "Motherfucker, our divorce was never finalized, we're still married and I am moving back in....."
My wife now, of almost 30 years has never cussed at me and we haven't had a good argument..yet.
Want some inside dirt on Executive Protection, Cop, Coroner or undertaker work? Put your questions in my in box or here under comments.
Is there a way I can edit these stories after I send them to you?
I find spelling errors and other minor stuff AFTER I send them.
I don't want to appear any more retarded than I am.... Thanks